By Karen B. Walant
Indifferent, alienated humans, a lot of them functioning with a pathologically built fake self, slightly navigate life's demanding situations. Our cultural emphasis on autonomy and separateness has resulted in a retreat from valuing interpersonal, communal dependence and has vastly contributed to an increase within the variety of humans whose soreness is frequently expressed in addictions and character problems. utilizing real sufferer fabric together with diaries and letters, Karen Walant's Creating the capability for Attachment exhibits how "immersive moments" in therapy―moments of entire knowing among sufferer and therapist―are strong sufficient to dislodge the alienated, indifferent self from its hiding position and permit the person to start incorporating his or her internal center into his or her exterior, social self.
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Additional info for Creating the Capacity for Attachment: Treating Addictions and the Alienated Self
So it was natural that Robert, James's father, would want to continue in this family tradition. One copy of the week's letter was sent to his father, mother, brother, and sister and another to his wife's mother and her several sisters and brother. Robert and Nancy had moved far from their families to New York City-all the more reason to attempt contact through letters. The next few pages offer edited versions of Robert's letters that, unfortunately, extend for only one and a half years and were either stopped or have since been lost.
That is what he wants. " She laughs. " And laughs again. He feels shamed, ridiculed, his pride in his language shifting to embarrassment in his awkwardness. 8 Creating the Capacity for Attachment These are momentary snippets from a child's life, any child's life. There is a mixture of achieving goals, communicating effectively, and failing. These examples serve to counter the psychoanalytic perspective that the baby inherently feels omnipotent and that only over time, as frustrations mount, does this grandiosity lessen.
What I have found is that the shift to this process enables the patient to become more mindful of his own thoughts and less reactive to my nonverbal cues. I have found that this approach relaxes the individual and enables him to reach feeling states that previously he had warded off. Sometimes the couch has enabled patients to recall unconscious memories in part because they can truly focus more fully on themselves, leaving behind the distraction of a more social relationship. Using the couch has the added benefit of enabling the individual to inwardly reflect before asking for my assis· tance.